Magdalene, our luscious heroine returns, now a vampire full-blown. Set on a single, late-winter's day this is a tale of consumption to gross excess, a "vampire crawl" if you will, a pub crawl in the company of vampires with a treasure hunt to drive the plot on its lurching sodden way. A new character is introduced who basks in Magdalene's immortal radiance. Samuel and Magdalene, and their rag-tag followers, embark on an adventure to uncover a rare apparatus that shows them a new way to comprehend past and future.

Magdalene: Even the smell of fruit made me salivate. I had taken a fresh kill in the morning and already my stomach growled. Sir William, at the height of his powers, could drain multiple women in one day. With my newly inherited memories, I brought up one particular memory of Sir William living in a cave, surrounded by dead and drained naked women, bodies strewn everywhere, their necks punctured and faces blue, absent of any life. Sir William had gorged himself until his stomach bloated round. I didn't know why he was forced to hide in a cave. I only knew he had escaped a hoard of angry men with clubs and pitchforks, hunting him down like a werewolf. But despite the death around him, the women offered themselves to him like sacrificial lambs. And one by one, they fell at his feet, worshiping his dark nature.

The very thought of such a scene of debauchery made me tingle. I was ready for more blood.

"All we know from his letter," I said to Kevin, "Is that Sir William wants us to visit this particular pub, which will apparently bring us to an extraordinary find, the likes of which have not been known by anyone in all of humanity."

"Fuck!" said Derek, "That sounds fucking ominous," he finished.

Auntie cuffed Derek on the head and he laughed in reaction. "I'm going to take the boot to that rear if you don't clean up that mouth."

"Yeah," mocked Kevin, "What kind of example is your setting for Finn?" he said, intentionally using 'is' instead of 'are'.

"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" mimicked Finn, excited about his new word.